So I will now return to my regularly scheduled broadcast. My novel begins with Muriel Morrissey in mourning. My novel ends . . . well let's just say with liberation. For her. And for Amelia. Since the loss of my mother I've been writing her eulogy. And of course because I'm a novelist, I got to write Amelia's, at least the one I thought her sister might give under the circumstances. I also got to put in Amelia's reaction to it. So what would it be like to hear your own eulogy? I don't think we often get to, unless we're characters in movies where for some reason there's been a terrible mix up and we show up at our own wake, or memorial service. And that just doesn't seem to happen all that much in real life, of course, tell me if I'm wrong on this one.
Amelia is pleasantly surprised, after all she's spent the novel wondering what on earth her sister will say. She's been more than a little surprised at what the rest of the world has been saying. For Amelia finds that in her absence there's been plenty of supposition without substantiation. Was she a spy? Was she captured and shot? Did she survive or die, plunging into the ocean? Was she a good enough pilot? Was her death her own fault? She finds all of this irritating to the extreme. But also comical. How could everyone get it so wrong? Because we all love a narrative, that's who we are. We're only human.
And eulogies are all about point of view. The one I'm writing will be different from the ones my siblings give. Writing mine for my own mother I focus on the personal, because that's what I most enjoy hearing. I want to know who that person was and what they did, what made them tick. I want to take scenes from their life away with me. That's what Muriel does for Amelia. And I suppose that because she was such a public figure the rest of the world got to do the same.
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I did not know she had died. i am sorry for this loss in your life. i hope you are holding up ok and i will let charlie know and we send you and the rest of your family our condolences and good wishes. Lisa
ReplyDeleteAs Joan Didion put it, we tell ourselves stories in order to live. I find it quite interesting to observe who tells what kind of stories about Amelia. The various spying and conspiracy theories about her disappearance, for example, mostly originated with World War II veterans and were elaborated upon (e.g., Fred Goerner) during the Cold War. I think it had to do with, among other things, the war generation's antipathy towards the Japanese, and the desire to make her into a hero of patriotism suitable to the 1950's middle-class sensibilities. To take another example, almost all the full-length biographies of her have been written by women. No mystery there; male biographers already have plenty of interesting male action-figures to choose from, and probably not very many of them are conversant enough with women's history to really get the significance of her life. Interestingly enough, one of the very few male biographers who did write about her life (as opposed to the disappearance mystery) also did an essay about her for Ms. magazine. (Can't remember his name at the moment. It'll come to me.)
ReplyDeleteThanks Lisa, I thought you knew, sorry. And Mkendrick, really interesting. Let me know if you remember the name of the biographer. I find this whole male/female division intriguing. By the by, I see that the expedition has found some artifacts at Nikumaroro. What are your thoughts?
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed reading this post. I suppose we all disappear like Amelia in a way when we die...it is the greatest mystery. And like you say, we all enjoy a good narrative, we're human and we love stories, and every life is a mystery story...Good luck with writing your eulogy for your mother. Perhaps for those of us who can't be there to hear it you may consider sharing it with us through this strange medium of cyberspace.
ReplyDeleteThanks Colleen, I don't know, seems a little odd to post my eulogy. But I've written it. Last night I dreamed she was alive but talking about her brother dancing with his wife, and that I knew she was dead, and knew that what she was describing never happened. Then of course, I woke up in tears. Grief is the oddest emotion. It kind of pulverizes you, then lets you off the hook, then comes after you in some other way.
ReplyDeleteIt seems like some part of the human brain sometimes knows what to do even though our consciously-controlled part of it doesn't. Like with grief: some part of the brain knows that we can't handle unrelenting heavy grief. So the pain comes in waves or doses instead of a steady stream. Colleen, does my layman's psychology make any sense? Anyway, Rose, I hope you're doing ok today and nurturing yourself with some tea and quiet time.
ReplyDeleteI checked the library last night and found that my fallible memory had conflated two sympathetic male authors into one. The author who did the full-length bio of AE is John Burke (Winged Legend, 1970). The one who did the magazine article is Pete Hamill (Ms., Sept.1976, pp.51 ff).
You asked for thoughts about the current crop of findings on Nikumaroro ... I'll post some thoughts this weekend when I have more time to sit at the computer.
Thanks so much for this info, Pete Hamill? Interesting, I'm going to look for these. And I'll wait for your thoughts on the expedition as well. Having been through this once before, as in grieving for a parent, I am trying to basically not assume anything about how I feel. That seems safest. But I am reading the latest and last mystery by Stieg Larsson.
ReplyDeleteSo, a few thoughts about the current findings on Niku....
ReplyDeleteFire features: I'm not surprised that more fire features have been found, especially around the ren tree. This tree may well have been the focal point of Amelia's camp, the location where she preferred to do as many of her work activities and cooking and lounging and sleeping as possible, because it would have provided the best shade in the campsite. Also, there's just something nice about being under a tree. I wish there were some way to determine whether this tree is the same one as the ren tree under which Gerald Gallagher reported finding the skeleton.
Pig bones taphonomy experiment: an interesting substantiation of a supposition that's been put forward a number of times on the Tighar Forum: that the hotter and more humid the climate, the more rapidly organic material breaks down, thus possibly accounting for Gallagher's overestimation of the age of the bones he saw (which could not have been there more than 3 years if they were indeed AE's). My particular take on this is that Gallager, who had been posted to the Gilberts less than 2 years as of 1940, hadn't yet enough experience in the tropics to have noticed that bones on the ground there weather much faster than in the cool temperate climate of the British Isles, where he'd spent all his life previously.
To be continued.
Pocket knife parts and parts of small jar with rounded bottom interior and embossing on bottom, suggestive of a cosmetics jar: As you probably know, previous expeditions have found other parts of the same knife; a portion of the bottom of a small bottle with traces of a lanolin-based product; fragments of a makeup compact mirror; and bits of (probable) rouge from the compact. It's bemusing to think that AE's androgyny carries over into the archaeological record. But then again, it's perfectly logical that she would have salvaged whatever cremes and lotions she had in the plane, knowing that her fair skin would be taking a burning beating under the fierce equatorial sun.
ReplyDeleteSmall clip of complex shape designed to screw onto a flat surface and hold a small cylindrical object: it would be interesting to know if it's the right size and configuration to hold a sextant eyepiece; as I understand it, sextant boxes often had a clip on the inside box wall to hold the detachable eyepiece. If the clip is of the right size, then I'm sure that thought has already occurred to the Tighar crew.
P.S. I don't know how closely and how long you've followed the Tighar website's research bulletins, documents library, news updates, and forum discussions. So let me know if I need to fill in more background for any of my remarks.
ReplyDeleteDear MKendrick, very interesting, I've been following all of this, indeed my novel opens with Amelia remembering being on the island, it's where I imagine her. I find their thesis the most viable myself. And all of this adds to my belief that she spent her last days there.
ReplyDelete